We’ve all heard the golden rule. “Treat others the way you want to be treated.” But, I would argue that there is a better one. Treat others the way they want to be treated. I call that the platinum rule.
Sure, everyone wants to be treated with basic respect and dignity, but that’s about where the similarities end. Respectful behavior looks different to everyone. Everyone has different triggers, different preferred methods of communication, and different life experiences that change what they view as “respectful.”
Yes, we may not know those things right away, but once we do, we should adjust our behavior accordingly and not just blindly treat everyone how we want to be treated. Treat every stranger with benevolence and respect, but once you know them, adjust your behavior to how they want you to communicate that you respect them.
One example of this is that I hate most nicknames. There is really only one that doesn’t feel infantilizing. But some of my friends have nicknames and prefer to be called them. So if they had followed the golden rule and given me a nickname, I would’ve accepted it, but I would’ve felt a little disrespected. Therefore, it would’ve been better if they hadn’t followed “The Golden Rule.”
However, the golden rule itself is a good thing to teach children. It fosters empathy by encouraging children to project themselves onto others. But, the golden rule should not be followed blindly after elementary school. Sure, it teaches empathy, but the platinum rule is how we truly create a kinder and more respectful world.
Until next time,
Ella Greene
