My daughter Lillie’s boyfriend won her a goldfish at Old Home Days. Lillie and I stopped at the pet store on the way home to buy her fish Summer a bowl and food. She also picked out a mermaid for Summer.
Lillie was going back to Old Home Days that night and was prepared to win Summer, a friend. I told her to pick a white one that she could name Winter!
We bring Summer home and we dump her water into the bowl and add water to it. I didn’t think anything of it. I carried Summer upstairs and put her in Lillie’s room. She continued to hide behind the mermaid and wouldn’t come out.
In comes my son Max to see what is going on. Max asks me if I know anything about caring for a fish. I just thought you would bring it home and add water to a bowl and feed the fish and there you go. Wow, was I wrong.
Max looks up how to care for a goldfish and starts telling me all about it:
Do you know you need a 20-gallon tank for one goldfish? Do you know that you have to condition the water? Do you know you need to change the water? Do you know you are supposed to test the water and the temperature? I didn’t know anything. I thought it was easy. I had no idea how complicated it was. I didn’t even think about researching how to care for a goldfish!
Max and I head to the pet store. We bought a 20-gallon tank set. We spent the entire night setting up the new tank and the water getting it ready for the fish. Lillie is having a fit that she doesn’t want this big tank in her room. Max sets the tank up in his room –
Get it all ready for the fish.
Make sure it’s conditioned and the right temperature.
Put the fish into the new tank.
Take over caring for this fish.
The fish is now Max’s, and it has been really amazing watching him do so many things to care for this fish every day. He thinks the fish is a boy and we name it Peter because Max loves Spiderman. I tell Max that we now need to go buy another fish and name it Parker and he tells me my tank is too small! Apparently, I needed a 30-gallon tank for two fish! Who knew. Look it up. No wonder all these goldfish die so soon. They aren’t being well taken care of. Goldfish can live as long as your cat!
I’ve learned a lot in the last week about goldfish. I’ve bonded with my son. I guess I should have gotten him goldfish ten years ago cause he’s really enjoying it and he now has a friend in his room.
However, Max is leaving for college in less than a month. Poor Peter is going to be all by himself when Max leaves. Peter really needs a friend!
What I realized through all of this is so much:
I realized that my kids really teach me so much.
I realized how good it is for our kids to be in charge of a pet. Max said it’s nice to have someone other than himself to care for.
I realized what an amazing bonding experience pets are for the family.
I realized how good this fish is for me. Let me explain. When Max goes away to college I figured I would go into his room and cry. Now there is Peter waiting for me. Now I go into Max’s room excited to see Peter. Now I go check on Peter, feed him, change his water. Peter is a gift for me. A gift I didn’t know I needed.
Max is on a trip with his friends. It has been good practice for me with him away. A little test of what it will be like. I miss him. I’m also taking care of his fish with Ella. We will continue to take care of his fish. It’s Max’s fish. Peter made a lot of waves, and we really love him.
If you get your children fish, if they win them at the fair, care for them the correct way.
Laughing, LEARNING, Loving our new fish Peter,
Rebecca Greene, LCSW-R
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