Sleeping Baby

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Trying to put Lillie down for a nap is so fucking hard!!!!! I have a small
ranch and loud children! It gets better…I tripped and broke my monitor so
I leave the door open so I can hear when Lillie is up! Where is that new
piece for my darn monitor it better fucking come today!

So I am trying to rock my very tired baby! First Ella comes up to me
screaming to get a hair off her tongue. Then Max starts screaming from the
bathroom to come wipe him (Max you are 6 wipe your own damn butt). So I go
put Lillie in her crib and wipe Max. I come back to Lillie wide awake. I
tell her its nap time and walk away. Lillie is whining singing and now
crying. If you know me you know I won’t let her cry…back to the drawing
board. Now I have a tired cranky baby and the 4 and 6 year old are as far
away from me as they can be giggling very loudly! I settle Lillie down get
her sleepy again, rock her, and put her back in her crib.

One of our three cats is now scratching at the bedroom door! Seriously, Lillie gets no peace
and quiet. I grab the cat and throw him in the living room and then run to
the front door because Max’s friend is now banging on the door. I guess the
sign I put up that Lillie is asleep means that it is ok to bang hard on the
door and wake her up. I tell Max’s friend he will be out to play in a few
minutes and then run into the kitchen because Max is opening and slamming
the fridge looking for more food. How many times can Max eat. Now there is
chicken all over my floor! Seriously Max, you can’t wait five seconds for me
to get you a piece of chicken! I calmly clean up the chicken (ok yes I
swore quietly a few times) and then gave Max some chicken (not the chicken
from the floor but trust me he wouldn’t care)! It has now been 45 minutes of
Lillie sleeping and I am completely exhausted from trying to keep my house
chaos to a minimum! Crap here comes Max’s friend again! I need to get him
outside!! In summary – I need a fucking bigger house and I need my fucking
wonderful kids to go back to school! I just love nap time!

Seth Greene

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