As I write this, I’m backstage at auditions for the fall play. Everyone is so tense yet so loud. There’s something about intensity that makes people caricatures of themselves. Whether they’re theater kids or not, people tense up and begin to forget everything that makes them great.
Everyone has something within them that is uniquely theirs. For me, it’s writing. For my friend who inspired this blog, it is undoubtedly acting (though I don’t know if she would say that). When anxiety creeps in, it makes us forget all about that thing. All of a sudden we debate everything about ourselves and nothing is true. I’ve experienced this time and time again with almost every major thing. Even right now I’m doubting my ability to deliver my audition monologue.
But, now that I’ve named it, it feels much smaller. Giving things a label gives them less power. Once you know a thought is fueled by anxiety and intensity it’s easier to manage. I think that’s because naming it forces you to slow down, and slowing down breaks the cycle of anxiety.
Anxiety relies on us not noticing it. When I can’t sleep because I’m too worried about something I don’t even notice I’m worried; I just feel. Noticing is the first step to solving your problem. Logic always helps me think myself out of an anxious moment. When my friend came up to me all nervous about today, I reminded her that she’s been a lead before and our director loves her, so I think she’s in the play.
Anxiety makes no sense half the time, and the sooner you realize that the easier it is to get over. Plus, when it does make sense, the problem is solvable (or there’s at least a best-case-scenario to focus on).
So, while I wait for the call back list, I will remember this blog. Just gotta keep reminding myself that I can act!
Until Next Time,
Ella Greene
ABOUT THE AUTHOR:
Ella Greene is a young writer from Buffalo, New York who writes Teenage Tuesday and has had poetry featured in numerous journals including Maudlin House and BlazeVox. Ella is a senior in high school and is involved in numerous clubs including Broadcast club, STUCO, Rising Electorette, Yearbook, Drama Club, and WISP.
